A Wonderful Wife

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(Respected Wife of Dr. Hafeezullah Madani [rahimahullah] - Part Three)

Dr. Kareemullah Makki, the son of Dr. Hafeezullah Madani (rahimahullah), mentioned the following regarding his respected mother:

My respected mother, until her demise, never once opposed the instruction of my father, even though fulfilling his instruction may have been awkward or caused her inconvenience.

Regarding my mother’s caution in spending wealth, I heard my respected father mention, “She never spent even one rupee without my permission.” In fact, she would not even spend her personal wealth or go to meet any person without first securing my father’s permission. Her obedience to my father and ensuring that she asked him before doing anything was to such an extent that she would not even acquire her basic necessities such as clothing, etc. without first consulting him.

My mother never went to the market place or a shopping centre. Instead, she would ask my father or us (her sons) to buy her whatever she needed. She also instilled this quality of shunning the shopping centres in my sisters. It is for this reason that none of the women of our household go to shopping centres.

My respected mother was very hardworking and would personally carry out all the household chores such as cleaning, sweeping, washing the clothing and dishes, cooking, etc. She was very particular regarding cleanliness. Every item of the home stayed in a specific place. She placed great emphasis on this and would thus say, “Whenever you take anything from its place, then ensure that you return it to its place after using it so that the next time it needs to be used, it will be found easily.”

My mother was very ordered and systematic in her ways and strongly disapproved of things that lacked system and order and were random and haphazard. Hence, when making the bed, she ensured that the duvet, sheets and pillows be equal on all the sides of the bed. Towards the end of her life, when my mother became bed-ridden, she would insist that the food that would be presented to the guest be brought to her first, in bed, so that she could examine it to see whether her daughters and daughters-in-law had placed all the items on the tray neatly and correctly.  She would always be concerned regarding the comfort of the guests and would enquire as to whether the guests needed anything.

We (the children) never saw our mother and father fighting or arguing with one another. She never did any action that would displease my father. Sometimes, other women would give her advice and suggest that she do something in a certain manner. My mother’s response would be, “I will first ask my husband, and I will not do it if it does not please him.” (Mithaali Khawaateen pgs. 332-335)

(to be continued insha-Allah)

Lessons:

1. It is the teaching of Islam that a woman should respect her husband and obey him in all permissible matters. If she conducts herself in this manner, then over and above the fact that she is in perpetual ‘ibaadah, her husband will be pleased with her, making her home one of happiness. If her husband is unhappy with her, she will naturally feel miserable and unhappy.

2. Every mother should strive to ‘train’ her children and instil the correct values and qualities in them. Not only should their minds be moulded correctly, but rather even their actions should be guided so that they learn to do things correctly.

3. If a woman is able to acquire her necessities without personally going to a mall/shopping centre, then she should try to do so.

4. Entertaining and seeing to the comfort of the guest is among the salient, glaring features of a Believer.

5. Today, many women consider it below their dignity to personally attend to the chores of the home, whereas in reality, a woman who personally carries out the work of the home is generally praised and admired.