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Betraying Bedroom Secrets

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Last Updated on Thursday, 19 April 2018 15:17

Imagine confiding in your best friend and revealing your deepest, darkest secret to her. However, to your utter dismay and horror, she then proceeds to broadcast your secret to all of society! How would you feel and what would your reaction be?

In all probability, you would feel mortified (extremely embarrassed) and would regard your ‘friend’ to be a backstabber. You would never again trust her and would be reluctant to even remain friends with her.

In this regard, one of the most important and serious secrets and trusts which should never ever be betrayed or revealed is the secret and trust of “bedroom secrets”.

Abu Sa‘eed Khudri (radhiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) said, “Indeed the greatest (betrayal of a) trust and secret in the sight of Allah Ta‘ala on the Day of Qiyaamah is (the betrayal) of a man who is intimate with his wife, and she is intimate with him, and he thereafter reveals her secret.” (Saheeh Muslim #3543)

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The Map of Marriage

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Last Updated on Monday, 05 March 2018 16:45

Any intelligent person undertaking a very long journey – through a route which he has not travelled before – will ensure that he makes adequate preparations before he departs. He will seek advice and directions and will make enquiries regarding the road and what to expect. After making all the appropriate preparations and taking all the necessary advice and directions, he will most likely carry a GPS to guide him along the way and prevent him from taking any wrong turns.

Marriage is also a journey. However, the journey of marriage is meant to last a lifetime. It takes one through different terrains and past various sceneries. While it may generally be smooth sailing, like a luxury car on an open freeway, there are sometimes the odd and unexpected gravel patches. While the route may mainly usher one past gardens, rivers, waterfalls and rolling seas, it does also sometimes lead one through dry and quiet deserts. If the traveller keeps his eye on the road and focuses on his destination, he will insha-Allah safely pass through all the hills and valleys as well as gardens and deserts.

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Safeguarding the Secret

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Last Updated on Tuesday, 31 October 2017 15:38

Imagine a woman who possesses an exquisite piece of jewellery. She values it, cherishes it and guards it, always fearful for its safety.

One day, in a moment of negligence, she confided in a person whom she had wrongfully regarded as a friend, informing her of the jewellery, its location and even its worth! Shortly thereafter, the home was burgled and her precious jewellery was stolen. In the aftermath of this tragedy, she wrung her hands in regret, lamenting to herself, “Why did I reveal the secret?”

Similarly, all women associate and interact with other women. As Allah Ta‘ala has created all people uniquely and blessed them differently, one woman may have some feature that is exceptionally attractive, while another may be attractive and blessed with beauty in a different aspect, and a third woman may be blessed with beauty in all aspects!

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A Sweet and Simple Nikaah

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Last Updated on Thursday, 21 September 2017 15:24

Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) was an illustrious Taabi‘ee who was the son-in-law and student of Sayyiduna Abu Hurairah (radhiyallahu ‘anhu).

Abu Wadaa‘ah (rahimahullah) narrates the following:

I would regularly sit in the gathering of Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah). However, there was once a period during which I remained absent for a few days. On my return, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) asked me, “Where were you?” I replied, “My wife passed away and I was thus preoccupied (with the funeral).” Hearing that my wife had passed away, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) exclaimed, “Why did you not inform me of her demise so that I could have attended the funeral!”

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Boundaries in the Bedroom

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Last Updated on Thursday, 10 August 2017 16:03

Imagine a person who hires a security guard to protect his home and family, only for the very same guard to later on become the greatest danger and threat to their safety! Imagine a person who daily takes a multi-vitamin supplement in order to improve his health, only for the very same supplement to later on become the cause of his health deteriorating, leading to his death!

In a similar vein, the hadeeth teaches us that one of the main purposes and benefits of nikaah is that it safeguards a person from falling into the sin of zina and other sins related to lust. However, this purpose will be defeated if a person fails to realize that even life within the bedroom has limits. A person’s bedroom life need not be ‘dry’. But on the same token, it is not necessary to resort to bedroom activities that are either outright haraam or totally unnatural and filthy in order to gain satisfaction. We are all aware that the husband may only seek satisfaction in his wife, and the wife may only seek satisfaction in her husband. But, this does not mean that they may satisfy themselves in any and every manner they please!

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