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Marriage

In Privacy, Not Public

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Last Updated on Thursday, 20 March 2014 16:07

It is natural that couples now and again become irritated and angry with one another. However one should never lose oneself in public and end up shouting and insulting one’s spouse in front of others. This will definitely be a means of embarrassment for the spouse and will create much bitterness in the marriage. More important than giving vent to ones anger and frustration is keeping the heart of one’s spouse. We need to control and contain ourselves, and train our minds to solve all problems and differences within the privacy and confines of our homes. 

   

Love and Obedience

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A husband and wife relationship does not work on the principle of instruct and obey, where the husband instructs and the wife obeys. Rather it is a relationship of love between the lover and the beloved. It is love that motivates us to be obedient, while our obedience enhances love for us in the hearts of others. Love and obedience work hand in hand in any marriage. In a marriage relationship, the husband expresses and shows his love for his wife and the wife expresses and shows her obedience towards her husband. The husband’s love and the wife’s obedience is what strengthens the bond of marriage. An oppressive husband or a disobedient wife is all it takes to cripple a marriage. If the husband rules with love and affection, then the wife will happily oblige and follow, and if the wife strictly obeys the husband, then the husband will be compelled to be more loving and caring. It nevertheless goes without saying that there can be no obedience to the creation in aspects that incur the displeasure of the Creator – Allah Ta‘ala.

   

In-laws or Out-Laws

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Last Updated on Thursday, 07 November 2013 14:32

Unfortunately the issue of in-laws often becomes one of the major contributing factors that strain the relationship between husband and wife. This sometimes even leads to divorce. In most instances it is only petty issues which are blown out of proportion.

Hereunder are a few basic guidelines which would assist in maintaining a happy relationship with your in-laws:

Read more: In-laws or Out-Laws

   

Marriage Survival Kit

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Last Updated on Wednesday, 25 September 2013 14:35

Do not demand your rights. Discharge your obligations!

Keep smiling. It is act of charity!

Express praise and gratitude. All human beings share the same basic needs: To feel appreciated, respected and loved!

Never compare your spouse with others. The grass always looks greener on the other side!

Never bring up past problems that were resolved. They only cloud the future!

Read more: Marriage Survival Kit

   

Be Positive!

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Last Updated on Thursday, 12 September 2013 15:35

The husband and wife should both protect themselves from negative thinking. The one who is positive sees everything in good spirits, whereas the one who is negative sees everything falling apart. A positive person enjoys the beauty of the rose, whilst a negative person continues to complain about the thorn beneath it.

If the husband and wife have a negative mind, then every word and move of any of the spouses will be a means of pain to the other. Everything will then be misinterpreted and will become a point of dispute. Don’t be like the wife who once told her husband: “Today I really saw a pious man. He was flying in the sky.” When the husband replied: “That was me,” she immediately responded: “I was wondering why he was flying so crooked.”

We simply need to become more positive. Before doing anything negative or jumping to any conclusion, reflect as to where this negativity will lead us to. Be positive. Insha-Allah you will enjoy positive outcomes.

   

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