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Misunderstanding between Spouses

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Monday, 25 June 2012 09:27

Correspondence of Hazrat Moulana Yunus Patel Saheb (rahimahullah) 

Letter

(unedited)

Asalamu alaikum Maulana

I have come across your website at a time when I most need guidance.

I am married for almost one and a half years. My husband and I have a very strong relationship most of the time. However, there are things we don't understand and this is causing conflict between us. I try very hard to be a good wife to my husband. Sometimes I get angry and upset with him. I say or do things in anger without thinking. I need guidance. I feel we don't communicate enough about what is bothering us and where we are going. Sometimes my husband irritates me in a good way but beyond the limit and I am finding it hard to handle. Please give me advice and guidelines on being a better wife. Sometimes he is wrong too, but he won't see it. May Allah reward you, Insha-Allah.

Jazakallah.

Read more: Misunderstanding between Spouses

 

10 Unique Privileges - `Aaisha (radiyallahu anha)

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Monday, 25 June 2012 09:07

10 Unique Privileges 

`Aaisha (radiyallahu anha) says: “Allah Ta’ala has blessed me with ten privileges over the other wives of Rasulullah (salallahu alaihi wasallam) and I say this without bragging or boasting:

- I was the most beloved to Rasulullah (salallahu alaihi wasallam) among his wives. 

- My father was the most beloved of all men to Rasulullah (salallahu alaihi wasallam). 

- I was the only virgin whom Rasulullah (salallahu alaihi wasallam) had married.  

- He married me at the age of seven. 

- I went to live with him at the age of nine. 

- (When people had slandered me and levelled accusations against me) Allah Ta’ala had exonerated me and confirmed my chastity and purity. 

Read more: 10 Unique Privileges - `Aaisha (radiyallahu anha)

 

Keeping the Heart Clean - `Aaisha (radiyallahu anha)

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Monday, 25 June 2012 09:16

The exemplary life of Sayyidah `Aaisha (radiyallahu anha) is filled with innumerable lessons. One major lesson that she taught was to always have a clean heart. On one occasion the hypocrites slandered her. It was an extremely trying time. Rasulullah (salallahu alaihi wasallam) as well as `Aaisha’s (radiyallahu anha) parents were very distressed by this terrible accusation. When `Aaisha (radiyallahu anha) came to hear of the false rumours about her doing the rounds, she became very ill. She could not eat a morsel of food nor sleep a wink. She wept almost continuously. Eventually an entire ruku of the Qur’an was revealed which cleared her name and explained how chaste and virtuous she was. While the hypocrites were responsible for this heart-breaking incident, unwittingly, a few sincere Muslims also got  caught up in this ugly accusation and defamation. Among them was Hassaan bin Thaabit (radiyallahu anhu).

Read more: Keeping the Heart Clean - `Aaisha (radiyallahu anha)

 

Goodbye to Depression

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Monday, 25 June 2012 09:31

Every second person complains of stress, anxiety and depression. There are three main causes for this: 

1. We have shifted our focus from Allah Ta`ala towards our abilities and resources, and towards people around us. Thus, when everything around us fails us, we lose hope in life and sink into a state of  depression. We have forgotten that our Allah Ta`ala alone has placed us in that condition and our Allah Ta`ala alone will remove us from that condition. Our attention and focus should constantly be directed towards the unlimited treasures of Allah Ta`ala and not towards our endless weakness.

2. We worry and concern ourselves over such things that are beyond our reach, and neither are they in our control. We become overwhelmed thinking about matters that have already been decided by our Allah Ta`ala. Mortal man, however, fails to accept that he has absolutely no say in such issues. Hence we become so involved in matters and things that are beyond our control that we end up neglecting what is in our control. The end result is disorder and helplessness which leads to depression.

3. Sins also lead to depression. It is impossible to be happy if Allah Ta`ala is unhappy with us. Our evil actions are the fuel to the fire of destruction and depression. Righteous actions will fill the heart with happiness.

 

Messed with Blue & Red Ink

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Monday, 25 June 2012 11:30

Imagine a child going for the first time to his father’s desk. The exciting pens, the pencils, eraser, letter-opener, etc. are all neatly arranged on one side. He begins to explore and investigate the use of each item. In a few minutes the entire place is in a mess. He also turns the inkpot upside down and the ink runs on his fingers, onto the papers, the desk and the carpet. The child obviously had no idea of the consequence of his innocent explorations. Gripped with fear , the child now starts wiping the ink off his fingers on the front of his clothes and he hastily starts wiping the ink off other items using whatever pieces of paper available to him. 

Now, what should your reaction be, to this child? Should you scream at him for his innocence? You judge for yourself. Would punishing such a child not be unfair to him? His curiosity got the better of him. He made a mistake. He did not know the reality of what he was doing. Would it not be better to sit with him and explain to him the wrong he has done, the mess he has made and the danger of exploring things on his own?

 

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