Fear of Deviation and Desire for Hajj

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Correspondence of  Hazrat Moulana Shah Hakeem Muhammad Akhtar Saheb (rahimahullah)

Condition:

I am very fearful of going astray. I think about my destiny very often and I do not know what is written for me. I constantly make du‘aa to Allah Ta‘ala for my destiny by saying, “O Allah! Make my destiny good. Save me from deviation.”

I have an extreme desire to perform hajj and ‘umrah, and to visit the blessed grave of Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam). Allah Ta‘ala repeatedly calls many fortunate people to His House. I become envious of these people. I make this du‘aa, “O Allah! You call everyone again and again, call me [to Your House] as well.”

Answer:

Insha-Allah, the person who fears and the person who makes du‘aa to be saved from deviation cannot be deviated. Allah Ta‘ala is the Most Merciful of those who show mercy. The person who is destined to be deviated does not even fear deviation.  

The desire to visit (Makkah Mukarramah and Madeenah Munawwarah) and to make du‘aa for this bounty is a sign of love (for Allah Ta‘ala). However, taqwa and abstention from sins are far greater bounties. A person who possesses taqwa enjoys the proximity of Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) without even going there, if hajj is not fardh on him. It is only necessary to go when haj becomes fardh.

(Solutions to Spiritual Maladies for the Lovers of Allah Ta‘ala, pg. 355)