Feeling Lonely

Question:

Assalaamu ‘alaikum

I am a 24 year old female. Recently, I have decided to try my best in fulfilling the laws of Allah Ta‘ala. However, I find that I am constantly sad whenever I am alone. When I am with company, I forget the sadness. I feel very lonely. I live alone with my parents and most of my family live far from home. I’m not the type who goes out much and barely have friends to speak to. 

I want to get married, however nothing has worked out so far. I do know that everything is in the hands of Allah Ta‘ala and I have accepted this. 

Also, my mother is constantly finding faults with whatever I do and this has been getting to me. I have tried speaking to her about it in a nice way. However, I am told that I am being disrespectful. 

Please advise me with some zikr, etc., or routine I can follow so I do not waste away time over thinking about matters which I have no control over, as well as a du‘aa that I can read for getting married.

Read more: Feeling Lonely

Viewed from within the Veil (Part Two)

The Fourth Step

The number of Muslims in Japan are few and are therefore seldom seen. Yet the response of the Japanese to my white khimaar was encouraging. I encountered neither rejection nor mockery. People assumed that I belonged to a religion, but they did not know which one. I overheard a young girl whispering to her friend that I was a Buddhist nun. Once, on a visit to Paris, I was in the same subway car with a Catholic nun. The Catholic nun’s covering and veil is a symbol of her devotion to God, and Christians respect and recognize her for this. Likewise, the hijaab is a symbol of devotion for every Muslim woman. I wonder why people who respect the nun’s covering criticize the hijaab of a Muslim, considering it instead a symbol of extremism or oppression!

Read more: Viewed from within the Veil (Part Two)

Viewed from within the Veil (Part One)

The following is a Japanese woman’s account of her journey to Islam. She explains, in detail, the various phases that she went through as a new Muslimah and the various misunderstandings that she initially had regarding the position of hijaab and niqaab in Islam. From a simple headscarf, she progressed until she was covered from head to toe, embracing hijaab and niqaab in its entirety.

In the beginning of the 1990’s, when I embraced Islam in France, the controversy surrounding the wearing of hijaab in school was an extremely heated issue. The French were faced with economic problems which had resulted in high unemployment and social insecurity. This was predominantly felt in the big cities. The immigrant population, especially from Muslim countries, was seen as one of the causes of unemployment. The sight of hijaab in their towns and schools aggravated already negative attitudes towards Muslims. The majority of people thought that allowing students to wear hijaab was against the public education system’s principle of neutrality on religion. I had not yet become a Muslim, and I did not understand why the schools were so concerned over a mere piece of cloth worn on a student’s head. Observing the hijaab from the outside, I also did not understand its significance to Muslims. But I considered that in maintaining neutrality in matters of religion, the schools should still respect a student’s beliefs and his performance of religious duties. As long as this expression did not disturb the school’s discipline, it should not be prohibited.

Read more: Viewed from within the Veil (Part One)

Etiquettes of Speech

1. Speak clearly and in a manner that is easy to understand. Hence, do not speak ambiguously or unclearly. Similarly, be to the point and do not mumble.

2. Always speak to people from the front. Do not stand or sit behind them and speak to them.

3. When a person is speaking to you, give them your complete attention.

4. Do not interrupt a person who is speaking until he completes what he needs to say.

5. Think before speaking.

Read more: Etiquettes of Speech

Lying Child

Question:

Assalaamu ‘alaikum

My son, who is almost three years old, has started telling imaginary tales. He also speaks untruths e.g. when asked if he has packed his toys, he replies yes, whereas he hasn't done so. How should such incidents be dealt with now so that he does not grow up with the habit of telling lies? 

Answer:

Bismihi Ta‘ala

Wa ‘alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barkaatuh

Respected Sister in Islam

The following are a few steps that you should take in order to try and assist your son to cease telling lies:

1. Repeatedly drum the lesson, in an endearing way, that Allah Ta‘ala does not like those who tell lies.

2. Explain the hadeeth that when a person lies, a smell emanates from his mouth which the angels can perceive. They (the angels of mercy) then flee up to one mile’s distance. How terrible is this!

3. If he is found to be lying, deprive him of some privilege for that day.

4. If he has spoken the truth, acknowledge it and reward him – even if it be some words of praise or a hug.

May Allah Ta’ala make him an honest and truthful servant of His. 

Answered by:

Uswatul Muslimah Panel of ‘Ulama