Please Note

This section generally contains selected correspondence which we receive via this website. They are published for general benefit without mentioning any names. Certain questions have been summarised to maintain anonymity. Furthermore keep the following points in mind when reading these questions:

1. Often many people have very similar circumstances. Never speculate about the identity of the person asking.
2. Never look down upon others or regard oneself as better than anyone.
3. Make du’aa for everyone.

When sending a question if you feel uncomfortable with it being published, please make mention of it.

Q&A

Husband is Cheating

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Last Updated on Monday, 08 December 2014 14:46

Question: 

(summarised)

As salaam

I am married and have 2 wonderful children alhumdulillah. A few months into my marriage I found out that my husband was seeing another woman. He told me he was sorry and it just happened, so I forgave him. But ever since then I have found him cheating but this time his cheating was physical. It came to a stage where I realized he wasn’t happy with me. Since he never wanted to divorce, I gave him permission to take a second wife, which he did not do.

A few months back I found out he has been chatting to a non Muslim woman who he had fallen in love with. He said that when he met her it was like she was what was missing from his life and he misses her and likes her a lot. She stopped all contact when she found out he was married and he was heartbroken over the fact that she was not talking to him. He kept trying to make contact with her, trying to win her back, until she was about to open a case of harassment against him.

So my thing is, had she accepted him he would have left me, but coz she doesn’t want him he is staying with me. It’s like he has no choice or I was the last option. With the other times I could forgive coz it never included feelings. My heart is not in this marriage anymore I really want out of it. I want to live my life for me and my kids. I don't think I can get past this time. I feel like he is just using me for his pleasure coz other than that there is nothing in our marriage 

Maaf for the long question but I’m really hoping you can assist. 

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Is Purdah Compulsory?

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Last Updated on Tuesday, 18 November 2014 15:35

Question: 

Salaam

Kindly explain to me if the purdah is compulsory on a woman, as I get different views from people and how is it different from only wearing the abaya and headscarf?

Answer:

Wa ‘alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh

Respected Sister

Apart from covering the rest of the body, it is necessary for a woman to conceal her face from strange (non-mahram) men.

The details in this regard are many. However, to understand the matter briefly, consider the following two verses of the Quraan Majeed. 

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Should I Attend?

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Last Updated on Thursday, 30 October 2014 14:47

Question: 

Assalaamu alaikum

Respected Panel of Ulema

I recently purchased a ticket to a program in Durban. This program is hosted by the … Institute. A broadcast has been going around to refrain from attending this program as it is by Salafies and they will destroy our imaan. I don’t know if this is true as most of these broadcasts are baseless although one can never be too sure.

If Moulana can advise whether I should attend or not, or if there is any truth in it?

Jazakallah 

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Hanafi or Muslim?

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Last Updated on Wednesday, 01 October 2014 16:29

Question: 

A friend at campus often asks fellow students: “Are you a Muslim or a Hanafi/Shaafi‘ee?” How does one respond to such a question? Please advise.

Answer:

The word “or” (in the context of the question) is used between two words of the same species. It is correct to ask someone whether he will eat “rice or bread” since both are food items, but you cannot enquire whether he will eat “bread or paper”. Likewise, if your friend asks someone whether he lives in Durban or South Africa, the question will be absurd. Only one who is ignorant of the fact that Durban is not a country, but a city in South Africa, can ask such a question.

Your friend’s question implies that one can either be a Muslim or a Hanafi. Thus if someone says he is a Hanafi then, Allah forbid, he is not a Muslim!! It is the same as asking whether you live in Durban or South Africa, and that if you live in Durban, then you are not a South African???

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In Laws not on Deen

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Last Updated on Monday, 15 September 2014 14:44

Question:

I have been brought up in a family where we do not celebrate birthdays nor do we have mixed gatherings and shake hands with any ghair mahrams. 

Unfortunately, in my husband’s family it is completely different. They celebrate birthdays, the gatherings are mixed affairs and the women even hug and even kiss some of their male relatives who are ghair mahrams. I was also once put in a situation where a male came and hugged me against my wishes.

I am recently getting worried that how do we bring our children up according to shariah whilst still respecting the family. This is mainly with regards to the issue of photographs.

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