Home Women's Issues Q&A Husband in contact with other women

Please Note

This section generally contains selected correspondence which we receive via this website. They are published for general benefit without mentioning any names. Certain questions have been summarised to maintain anonymity. Furthermore keep the following points in mind when reading these questions:

1. Often many people have very similar circumstances. Never speculate about the identity of the person asking.
2. Never look down upon others or regard oneself as better than anyone.
3. Make du’aa for everyone.

When sending a question if you feel uncomfortable with it being published, please make mention of it.

Husband in contact with other women

PDFPrintE-mail

Question:

Assalaamu-alaikum. 

Please advise me. I am married to a learned person for many years. I was totally on the wrong path when I met him but Alhumdullillah he showed me the way. I stopped communicating with all my male friends and family. I'm making my salaah, fast in ramadaan sit in taleem everyday. We have 5 kids together however he is at all times on his phone with women. He hides his phone from me and it’s always on silent if he is at home. Every night he is out with his friends, so I assume. I can't handle it anymore please do advise me on what to do. 

Jazakallah Khairan

Answer:

Bismihi Ta'ala

Respected Sister

Walaikumus  Salaam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu

1. In light of the details that you have mentioned, we suggest that you contact either a senior experienced Aalim who is familiar with your husband or one of your husband's teachers who he may be keeping in contact with. Inform them of the situation and ask them to intervene and talk to your husband. If no such person is available, close by, the other option is to speak to some senior family person who is level headed and can handle the situation in an appropriate manner. 

2. Immediately commence ta'lim in the home. 

3. Encourage your husband to develop an islaahi (reformation) link with some pious personality. 

4. While it is indeed painful to go through this situation, in the interim mask your feelings as best as you can and show extra affection to your husband, in your treatment towards him, in your cooking, dressing, giving of simple gifts, etc. Try to win his heart with affection. It will Insha-Allah turn his heart away from any incorrect contact. 

May Allah Ta'ala grant your husband the tawfeeq of abandoning any wrong actions and bless you with true happiness in your marriage. 

Was Salaam

(Moulana) Muhammad Ilyas Patel