Home Women's Issues Q&A Married Woman Making Istikhaarah regarding Another Man

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Married Woman Making Istikhaarah regarding Another Man

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Question:

Assalaamu ‘alaikum

Respected ‘Ulama

My question pertains to reading istikhaarah salaah in the following context:

If a person is married, but it’s not a very happy marriage, and after a few years, there is another person that enters this person’s life who seems to be a better match, then can istikhaarah be made regarding this other person?

I know that it essentially seems strange to want to read istikhaarah to see if another person is good for you while married to another, but can this be done? If not, is there perhaps an alternative solution to this problem?

Answer:

Bismihi Ta‘ala

Wa ‘alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barkaatuh

Respected Sister in Islam

To have any casual contact with a non-mahram is haraam. It is totally wrong for a woman to entertain thoughts of any non-mahram while she is married. To make “istikhaarah” in such a situation is totally misplaced.

She should work towards improving her marriage and bringing barakah therein. She should start off with the following:

1. Daily  ta’leem of the Fazaail-e-Aa’maal and Fazaail-e-Sadaqaat for at least ten minutes. She should encourage her husband to participate but not insist. If he does not join, she should sit and read the kitaab with her children.

2. She should eat with her husband from the same plate. Occasionally they should share morsels with each other.

3. Occasionally they should give one another gifts, even if they be small items. It does not have to be something expensive.

4. Daily zikr and tilaawat of the Quraan Majeed in the home.

5. Daily she should make the following du‘aa after every salaah from the depth of the heart:

رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا

O our Rabb, grant us spouses and children who will be the coolness of our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.

May Allah Ta‘ala bless her marriage with barakah and happiness.

Answered by:

Uswatul Muslimah Panel of ‘Ulama