Home Women's Issues Spiritual Maladies Speaking to Non-Mahrams

Introduction

Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) is reported to have said: “Allah Ta’ala does not look at your features (that who is more beautiful or what is her complexion) and wealth, but He looks at your hearts and actions.” (Saheeh Muslim #6543) While millions are spent on cosmetics, clothing, jewellery, etc, to adorn the outerself, how much effort do we make to purify our hearts and treat the maladies that create a terrible stench therein? The procedure to purify the heart is to refer to the Mashaayikh (spiritual guides) and seek the remedies to one’s spiritual ailments. Hadhrat Moulana Shah Hakeem Muhammad Akhtar Saheb (mudda zilluhu) is among the spiritual giants of our time who has helped numerous people overcome their spiritual maladies. A selection of the correspondence of those seeking spiritual guidance will be posted for general benefit. May Allah Ta’ala make it a means of our complete rectification.

Speaking to Non-Mahrams

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Correspondence of  Hazrat Moulana Shah Hakeem Muhammad Akhtar Saheb (rahimahullah)

Condition:

I made efforts to abstain from casting evil glances and backbiting. I was able to save myself at times while I was deluded by the nafs and Shaitaan at other times. The thought comes constantly into my mind that I ought to give up these sins. The sin of casting evil glances is committed because we all live together and non-mahrams come constantly before us. When it is necessary for me to speak to a non-mahram, I try to lower my gaze but it automatically looks up. No thoughts come to my heart and I am not spoken to when I lower my gaze. I am making every possible effort. Kindly show me a way of lowering my gaze even when I am speaking to others.

Answer:

It is not permissible to converse with non-mahrams unnecessarily. If such talking is causing harm to your heart and you are unable to safeguard your gaze, then it is not permissible to speak as well. Safeguard your body, your heart, your eyes, and remain far (from these people).

It is also compulsory for one to remain distant from the causes of sin. If not, you will get involved in unlawful relationships. Observe purdah with the non-mahrams at your house. Cover your face and body, and continue with your domestic tasks. Do not unnecessarily speak with non-mahrams. Use the courage which Allah Ta‘ala bestowed you with and do not worry about anyone. If you desire peace and tranquillity, stay aloof from these people for the sake of Allah Ta‘ala. May Allah Ta‘ala inspire all of us to use our courage. (Solutions to Spiritual Maladies for the Lovers of Allah Ta‘ala, pg. 370)