Question:
Assalaamu ‘alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh
I am sending you this message in collaboration with my friend. We are both single Muslim girls and are facing a difficult situation. We do not know how to handle it and seek guidance.
We have been practising Muslims to an extent, Alhamdulillah. We observe the Islamic dress code and come from families where religion is a priority. We have some knowledge of Deen, but we fear our understanding is insufficient, as we have much to feel guilty about.
I am 23, and my friend is 19. We started working together on a project in November, which lasted until January. It was a group project, and during that time we were mere acquaintances. We had respect and admiration for each other, but nothing beyond that.
After the project ended, we became very close. We shared our personal secrets and became the best of friends. Over time, we realised that our feelings went beyond friendship. We could not stop thinking about each other and looked for reasons to be together. Three weeks ago, we confessed our feelings and subsequently became physically involved. There has been no exposure of our ‘awrah, but we know that even our current actions are unacceptable in our religion.
Brother, we know this is wrong, yet our feelings are intense and seem very real—we have never felt this way about anyone else. We want to end this and address the root of the problem rather than merely suppressing our emotions.
We recognise that our Imaan is weak, and we fear for our Aakhirah. We do not want to live under the wrath of Allah Ta‘ala.
We hope you can guide us to overcome this situation and help us return to the right path. Please make du‘aa for us, brother, as we are in dire need.
Jazaakallahu Khairan
Answer:
Bismihi Ta‘ala
Wa ‘alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh
Respected Sisters
Alhamdulillah, you have recognised that this type of association is wrong and falls directly under the wrath, anger and curse of Allah Ta‘ala. In Arabic, the word la’nat refers to being excluded from the mercy of Allah Ta‘ala. Such associations, if continued, can lead to la’nat.
The best course of action for both of you is to separate permanently for the sake of Allah Ta‘ala. You should avoid all contact – do not speak to one another. This act, though difficult, will earn you immense reward, and the hardship you endure can become a means of experiencing the sweetness of Imaan.
Reflect upon the consequences of la’nat, and you will understand the urgency of immediate separation. There is no harm if this separation occurs abruptly. Allah Ta‘ala will reward you for the pain, emotional struggle, and grief that you undergo.
Remember, your primary allegiance is to Allah Ta‘ala. People come and go, but you cannot sever your relationship with Allah Ta‘ala. Any worldly relationship can be broken for His sake. If your separation is purely for the sake of Allah Ta‘ala, then you can be assured of His immense recompense.
And Allah Ta‘ala knows best.