“A Muslimah’s Guide to Living a Blissful Life” by Sayyidah Khairun Nisaa (rahimahallah) #5
I first wish to discuss and address those weaknesses of yours which are not inherent (i.e. they are not a part of your nature), but are rather found in you due to some external factor. Although your parents have neglected to address these weaknesses and faults within you, the day will definitely dawn when the ill-effects of these weaknesses will be witnessed.
It may be that though you are unaware of it, you have the weaknesses of bad character, carelessness, negligence, selfishness, love for luxury, lack of etiquette and respect, miserliness and haughtiness. These weaknesses are such that you may not necessarily perceive them now, but as time passes and you grow older, they will become more and more poisonous. At that point, you will have no friends and nobody will want to associate with you.
Therefore, make an effort and try your best to acquire two good traits; intelligence and understanding, and hayaa (modesty and shame). Intelligence and understanding will guide you and teach you how to behave and conduct yourself. Likewise, hayaa will deter and prevent you from falling into sins and evil actions. These two qualities will assist you and benefit you at every juncture in your life. Furthermore, you will never suffer humiliation and disgrace, and people will never find an opportunity to criticize you and speak ill of you. If any difficulty befalls you, then by the will of Allah Ta‘ala, you will easily overcome it.
All the systems of the world are based on intelligence and understanding. Hence, a person will achieve excellence and perfection in his work, in accordance to the level of intelligence and understanding that Allah Ta‘ala has blessed him with. The strength or collapse of every structure is dependent on the level of intelligence.