In many cases, married life has boiled down to moaning, groaning, demanding and complaining. Every wife should ask herself: “When last did I sincerely say a heartfelt ‘Jazakallah’ to my husband?” If one cannot recall when last one did this, the question is: “Why can’t I remember? Should this not have been a regular aspect?”

Unfortunately, many of us have largely forgotten the lesson of gratitude. Often, if our husband says or does just one thing against our wish or desire, our immediate response is: “You have never done anything for me!” Yet the husband may have done so much for us.

 Due to being very emotional and impulsive, we are quick to speak our mind and vent our feelings. In order to remedy the situation, we need to simply ponder and recount the favours of our husbands. For a while, let us forget our never-ending desires, as this will allow us to appreciate and be thankful to our husband. Our appreciation and gratitude will bring about happiness, sparking life into our marriage once again.

On seeing a person who is starving, none of us will respond by starving ourselves as well. Instead, we will help the person if possible and express appreciation for the food that we have. Similarly, if our husbands do not show appreciation, then instead of stooping to their level and ‘starving’ ourselves of the great rewards and benefits of appreciation, we should make du‘aa for them and hold onto gratitude. If we respond to ingratitude with more ingratitude, our marriage will become one of double-ingratitude.