Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) was an illustrious Taabi‘ee who was the son-in-law and student of Sayyiduna Abu Hurairah (radhiyallahu ‘anhu).

Katheer bin Abi Wadaa‘ah (rahimahullah) narrates the following:

I would regularly sit in the gathering of Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah). However, there was once a period during which I remained absent for a few days. On my return, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) asked me, “Where were you?” I replied, “My wife passed away and I was thus preoccupied (with the funeral).” On hearing this, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) exclaimed, “Why did you not inform me of her demise so that I could have attended the funeral!”

After a few moments had passed, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) asked me, “Have you looked for another wife?” I replied, “May Allah Ta‘ala have mercy on you! Who would get me married, as I possess no more than two or three dirhams?” Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) answered, “I will get you married (to my daughter).” In astonishment, I asked, “Will you really get me married?” He replied, “Yes,” and thereafter recited the khutbah by praising Allah Ta‘ala and sending salutations on Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam). He then performed my nikaah.

On the completion of my nikaah, I stood and was filled with such joy and happiness that I did not know what to do! I returned to my home and began to ponder over which people I could approach for a loan. At the time of Maghrib Salaah, I left to perform my salaah and again returned home. I was alone and had been fasting, so I prepared to break my fast with a simple supper of bread and olive oil. At that moment, I heard a knock on my door.

I called out, “Who is it?” The person knocking replied, “Sa‘eed.” I thought of every person named Sa‘eed besides Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah), as for the past forty years, he had only been seen on his way from his home to the musjid, or going from the musjid to his home. When I went to the door, I was surprised to see that it was Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah). Seeing him, I began to think that he had changed his mind (and regretted marrying me to his daughter). I said to him, “O Abu Muhammad! Why did you not send for me so that I would have come to you (instead of you taking the trouble to come to me)?”

Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) replied, “No, you are more worthy of me coming to you. You were without a wife, and you are now married, so I did not want you to spend the night alone. Here is your wife.” As he said that, I saw her standing behind him. He grasped her hand, led her into my home, and then left, closing the door behind him.

My wife, the daughter of Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah), immediately collapsed, overwhelmed by extreme hayaa and modesty. I secured the door and placed the plate containing my meagre supper in the shadow of the lamp so that she would not see it. I then climbed to the roof of my home and called out to my neighbours who soon assembled, asking me what the matter was. I explained my situation to them and they hastened to assist me. Soon, the news reached my mother who also arrived.

When my mother came, she said to me, “It is haraam for you to look at my face if you touch your wife before I first pamper and prepare her for three days.” I thus waited for three days after which I began to live with my wife.

I found her to be the most beautiful of women, and one who had excelled in memorizing the Quraan Majeed and the ahaadeeth of Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam). She was also fully aware of all the rights of the husband.

I remained with her for a month without attending the gathering of Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) and again joined his gathering once the month had passed. On arriving, I made salaam to which Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) replied, but he did not speak to me until the gathering had terminated and the crowd had dispersed.

When everyone had departed and we were alone, he asked me, “How is that person (referring to his daughter)?” I replied, “She is excellent, O Abu Muhammad! She is as a well-wishing friend would wish her to be for me, and as an enemy would dislike her to be for me.” Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) said, “If you have any problem then discipline her.”

I thereafter returned home, after which Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) sent me a gift of twenty thousand dirhams (silver coins).

(Siyaru Aa’laamin Nubalaa vol. 4, pg. 233)

Lessons:

1. The hadeeth teaches us that if a person wishes to enjoy a blessed and blissful marriage, he should make piety the primary criterion when selecting a spouse. Although Katheer bin Abi Wadaa‘ah (rahimahullah) was in poverty, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) married his daughter to him, as securing a home of piety for her was his main priority.

Thus, when the ruler, ‘Abdul Malik, had proposed on behalf of his son, Waleed, for the daughter of Sa‘eed (rahimahullah), he refused, as he was concerned about the Deen of his daughter. Eventually, the ruler even lashed Sa‘eed (rahimahullah) a hundred times, attempting to force him to give his daughter’s hand in marriage to Waleed. However, Sa‘eed (rahimahullah) remained firm and finally married his daughter to Katheer bin Abi Wadaa‘ah (rahimahullah). (Siyaru Aa’laamin Nubalaa vol. 4, pg. 233)

2. A person having a timid nature may likely faint when given a fright, as his senses become completely overwhelmed. Such was the nature of Sa‘eed bin Musayyab’s (rahimahullah) daughter. Hence, when meeting her husband for the first time, her outstanding quality of hayaa (shame and modesty) was so dominant that it overpowered all her senses, causing her to collapse! If we find it difficult to comprehend or imagine a level of hayaa as high as this, then it is due to the breakdown and deterioration of hayaa in society today.

3. When praising his wife, Katheer bin Abi Wadaa‘ah (rahimahullah) mentioned that she was blessed with the ‘ilm (knowledge) of Deen and was fully apprised of the husband’s rights. In this regard, we should realize that just as it is important for us to acquire the relevant knowledge of Deen, it is also imperative for us to fulfil the rights of our spouse and strive to earn their happiness.

4. Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam) has informed us that the marriage which earns the greatest blessings is the marriage in which the least expenses are incurred. Hence, Sa‘eed bin Musayyab (rahimahullah) performed his daughter’s nikaah with utmost simplicity, understanding that this lays the foundation for a blissful marriage.