Condition:
Hazrat, as far as backbiting is concerned, all thanks are due to Allah Ta‘ala that I am able to abstain to a great extent. It is the grace of Allah Ta‘ala that if backbiting occurs in any gathering, He gives me the courage to get up and leave. However, there are certain issues which I do not understand. One is that even when I am getting up to leave the gathering, some of the backbiting falls into my ears (hence am I sinful for hearing it or not?).
Answer:
Get up immediately and leave from there. You will not be taken to task for unintentionally hearing the backbiting. However, if you stop for even a single moment to hear what is being said, it will be a sin and you must atone for it.
Condition:
Hazrat, at times I do not even realize that backbiting is taking place. But once I realize it, I make effort to immediately get up and leave.
Answer:
When you realize that it is backbiting, atone for it. Seek forgiveness, admit your error in the gathering, and engage in esaal-e-thawaab (conveying the reward of good deeds) for the person against whom this sin was committed.
Condition:
If I go as a guest to someone’s house and the person starts backbiting, what should I do?
Answer:
Whether one is a guest or a host, or anything else, the same rule applies to everyone. You should either stop the person from backbiting or leave the gathering.
(Solutions to Spiritual Maladies for the Lovers of Allah Ta‘ala, pg. 562)