(The English Wife of Moulana ‘Uzair Gul [rahimahullah] – Part Three)
Time passed and eventually one day Moulana Husain Ahmad Madani (rahimahullah) called the English woman and explained to her that when she had accepted Islam, her marriage with her previous husband had broken off, since he did not accept Islam. He further explained that it is in the best interest of her Deen to get married. He further added that marrying Moulana ‘Uzair Gul (rahimahullah) would be a means of great good fortune for her since this will enable her to learn the teachings of Deen freely with ease.
She explains in her own words, “My shaikh and murshid (spiritual guide), Moulana Madani (rahimahullah), impressed the importance of this nikaah upon my heart to such an extent that I became convinced that the only path for my success in the Hereafter is that I should permanently leave my life of comfort and luxury, my wealth, fame, relatives and family members, and my homeland. Furthermore I should live the rest of my life with this poor person, who may not be able to offer me worldly comforts, though he will definitely bestow me with the knowledge of Deen and the fear of Allah Ta‘ala.”
However, she requested Moulana Madani (rahimahullah) to give her some time to inform her children who had gone to England regarding this decision. Although the validity of the nikaah was not dependant on their approval, she nonetheless desired to inform them and embark on it once she receives their approval. Moulana Madani (rahimahullah) agreed to this wish of hers.
Two months after the demise of his wife, Moulana ‘Uzair Gul (rahimahullah) was still in Deoband, when a letter from the English Woman came addressed to him which stated:
“Your house is (now) gloomy due to the tragedy of the passing of your respected wife. Young innocent children are now alone and there is no one at home to take care of them. Thus, you will be forced to marry someone or the other in order to keep the house running and for the sake of the children. It is obvious that the wife who comes will be the stepmother of these children. Generally, the upbringing of a stepmother in regard to the children (of another woman) is not naturally very pleasant. If she thereafter gets her own children, then more difficulties will arise for these children.
“Due to accepting Islam, I am now free and not in anyone’s marriage. I am approximately fifty years old. Therefore, I have not even considered getting married. But now this thought has come to my mind that I should get married to you for the benefit of the teaching and upbringing of these children whom I have regarded as my very own children until now, and so that I may run your home. Neither do I have the desire for (getting) children nor am I able to bear children at this age. For this reason, I will never be (regarded as) a stepmother to these children. Rather, I will bring them up as if I am their biological mother. Furthermore, I also have this in mind that I may come under the supervision of a great person like yourself. Therefore, please accept my request for marriage.”
However, Moulana ‘Uzair (rahimahullah) replied that he was not keen on marrying her and stated a few reasons; some of which were:
1. He is very strict on purdah, whereas she has lived her entire life without it. Hence, she will be unable to bear his strictness in this regard.
2. He does not possess his own home. Rather, he resides in a small home provided by the madrasah. On the other hand, she has spent her entire life living in spacious and luxurious homes. Therefore, she will find it difficult to manage in a small home.
3. He receives a bare minimum salary from the madrasah, which will not allow him to provide for her according to her standards.
In reply to this, she wrote a lengthy letter stating that she is prepared to accept any condition that he puts forward. She explained that she is prepared to go into strict purdah and live in any type of home, and on a meagre income. In conclusion, she remarked, “The only wish I have is to give the correct upbringing to your children and come under your care through marriage. In order to gain this fortune, I am prepared to make any sacrifice.”
However, Moulana ‘Uzair (rahimahullah) presented more excuses and made every effort to stall this proposal. Subsequently, more letters went back and forth, until eventually, the last letter she wrote was very effective and forceful. A few touching statements of this letter were:
“Fine, I have accepted all the conditions you have presented and I have resolved all the hurdles which you have pointed out. Now the reality is this that you have no excuse to refrain from marrying (me). Despite this, if you still do not accept this request of mine, then on the Day of Qiyaamah, if Allah Ta‘ala takes me to task for spending the rest of my life, after accepting Islam, unmarried and without donning this garment (of having a husband), I will excuse myself in front of Allah Ta‘ala and say that I had chosen an excellent person and made every effort to marry him. However, he refused (to do so) without any valid reason and he did not wish to bring me in his care. So now think carefully; what excuse will you be able to present before Allah Ta‘ala?”
All these letters were sent in English whereas Moulana ‘Uzair Gul (rahimahullah) could not understand English. Therefore, his dear friend, Moulana Tufail Ahmad (rahimahullah), would read these letters out to him and would send the response in English. Thus, he was aware of whatever she had told him prior to this. After reading this last letter, Moulana Tufail Ahmad (rahimahullah) also insisted that Moulana ‘Uzair (rahimahullah) accept this proposal. Many other well-wishers also advised him to pursue this marriage. However, Moulana Madani (rahimahullah) played the biggest role in convincing him to marry her.
When Moulana ‘Uzair (rahimahullah) finally agreed and was ready to go ahead with the marriage, Moulana Madani (rahimahullah) sent a message to her saying that since they are both ready to get married, she should not wait for her children to reply. Moulana Madani (rahimahullah) himself set the date, and finally during the last ten days of Ramadhaan 1355 A.H, Moulana ‘Uzair (rahimahullah) went to Manglaur together with a few of his friends, and Moulana Madani (rahimahullah) performed this nikaah.
A few days after getting married, a letter from her children arrived saying that they do not approve of this marriage in the least. She explains that (at that moment) she understood that Moulana Madani’s (rahimahullah) instruction of not waiting for their reply was in actual fact better for her because had she read their response prior to the nikaah, it would have been difficult to carry out his instruction.
(Al-Furqaan Monthly – January 1979 pg. 30)
(to be continued)
Lessons:
1. Undoubtedly, this woman understood her goal in life better than many born Muslims. She understood that the Hereafter is her abode and thus gave preference to it over the luxuries of this world. Despite hailing from a royal background, she sacrificed her royalty (i.e. her spacious home, wealth, free time, and all her belongings) for ‘loyalty’ (i.e. to gain closeness to Allah Ta‘ala and to learn more about Him and His Deen), and in order to look after Moulana ‘Uzair’s (rahimahullah) young innocent children.
2. When a person takes the advice of a knowledgeable person, a responsible parent, or an experienced elder, whether it be regarding marriage or anything else, he will not regret that decision, rather he will understand the wisdom behind it after some time.