Question:
Assalaamu ‘alaikum
My son will be completing his matric this year insha-Allah. He is very deeni inclined, loves the musjid, listens to deeni talks and Quraanic recitation from his phone and shows no inclination towards succeeding in his secular studies.
We come from a modern background. My husband is adamant in him going to university and getting a degree. I am afraid of my son not living to my husband’s expectations because at this stage, when he is so close to the final exams, he is showing no inclination to take his secular studies seriously.
I find it very difficult to talk to my husband as he feels that I am not supporting him in his efforts for my son to succeed.
Please advise.
Jazakallah
Answer:
Bismihi Ta‘ala
Wa ‘alaikumus salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barkaatuh
Respected Sister in Islam
In this time and age, when most young boys are generally inclined to the glitter and glamour of the world and are falling headlong into every vice, one must be extremely grateful to have a son who is deeni inclined and wishes to pursue the path of deen. He should be fully encouraged. Such a child will insha-Allah become a true asset to the parents. He will be a source of peace and assistance in this world and will be a true asset for the parents when they have left this world. Insha-Allah he will become a means of sadaqah jaariyah – and this is what we will need more than anything.
On the other hand, many who went on to university, etc. unfortunately lost their hayaa, their deeni values in general and some even lost their imaan – Allah Ta‘ala forbid.
The father should spend a day at campus and observe what goes on. Many youngsters at university were caught up in the worst haraam – not because they wanted to – but because they were relentlessly pursued by the immoral girls on campus, and they eventually fell into the mess. This is not based on hearsay. Youngsters who have fallen in the mess have confessed to various ‘Ulama and sought advice on their tragic situation.
In any case, we suggest that you appear to support your husband BUT, as advice to him, suggest to him that he consult a senior, experienced ‘Aalim.
May Allah Ta‘ala increase your son in all his good qualities and bless your husband with the correct understanding.
Answered by:
Uswatul Muslimah Panel of ‘Ulama